Couples Counseling

 

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What I tell couples who seek me out for counseling when they first come to the office is that what they will experience will most likely not be therapy though the results will be therapeutic. Therapy in most cases should be pursued individually with occasional visits by a spouse or significant other if relationship issues were a primary concern. Couples counseling as I practice is a structure-based, communications-focused method of reaching out to possibility the most important person in your life. A means to re-establish what has been lost or building what may never have been there from the beginning.

Forming deeper more flexible connections that can grow and change as individuals grow and the relationship changes is at the heart of couples counseling and providing the couple with the tools they need to achieve that connection is the counselor’s role. I often say to couples that I want them to leave the office being able to do my job. To be able to bridge the difficult times, be it raising children or the stress brought on from a career or loss of a job, and yes even infidelity. Once the couple can begin to communicate about the emotional impact of their actions on each other and less on the specifics of the actions true understanding begins to take hold.

Helping couples manage expectations is another important component. How we view a situation, how we think about and frame our thoughts contributes greatly to how we feel about a topic. Changing our thinking or viewing a situation from a different point of view can often help couples lesson the emotional impact and the need to lash out. All too often one or both individuals will come to the relationship with pre-conceived notions that go unspoken because those notions seem a part of the basic pattern of life. When that individual finds their mate doesn’t share the same viewpoint tension can build in the relationship that take too long to address.

Robert (Bob) Ryan is an Licensed Mental Health Counselor, Psychotherapist and Registered Art Therapist in St Petersburg FL. He serves individuals and couples in the entire state of Florida with caring personal respect regardless of race, creed or gender identification. His insurance-friendly practice can be reached at rbrt.j.ryan@outlook.com.

 

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